Happy May long weekend, dear readers!
For those of you who are from elsewhere and don’t know, Canadians have a long weekend this weekend for Victoria Day. We don’t use it to celebrate Queen Victoria –long dead – but rather most of us use it as an excuse to be drunk for three days, take a trip up north, or get our gardens in tip-top shape for summer. Everyone gets excited because it signals the end of a long winter and the beginning of hot days!
Of course, some of us aren’t so lucky to take advantage of the extended weekend, and I extend my deepest sympathies to anyone who works in retail. I’m lucky to have generous coworkers who took my Sunday shift off my hands, and now I’m free to spend all weekend at bae’s cottage (I solemnly swear to never call him that again) and write you all a leisurely letter. So far, I’ve spent my weekend reading, planning a course, eating good food, watching the water, and (I can’t help myself) watching Game of Thrones. I’m simultaneously keeping up with the current season and watching from the beginning; I’m almost at season 3, and I can’t shut up about it!
I feel great and I’m really enjoying my long weekend, but I can never decide if I’m taking too much time off, or just the right amount. I’m naturally a very slooooow person, and I could do one task in a day and feel relatively accomplished. Even on days when I’m busy, I can’t decide if it’s a normal amount of busy or if it’s only busy for me that would be considered a slow day by others. It freaks me out when people say a run or yoga class can be one’s “me-time” for the day, because to me, that’s work!
I’m constantly comparing myself to other people as a marker of my success and progress, which unpleasant and kind of dangerous to my self-esteem. I’m sure I’m not alone in that bad habit, but I won’t ask you all to raise your hands. I keep trying to remind myself that as long as I get all my shit done in due time, then I’m a-okay. Of course, it’s a process to accepting myself. It can be so hard to just accept where you’re at without casting a shadow on the way you feel or the things you do. I’m realizing lately that self-acceptance is more than just skin deep. Of course, you need to respect your body, but you also need to accept your values and personality and not pick yourself apart every day.
Wishful thinking, right? But a goal worth working toward. It’s so hard, and so important, to be nice to ourselves. For now, I’m more than content to sit here at the lake, writing this, and thinking about my life with a little smile on my face. I’m loved, I love, and eventually I’ll find a rhythm of life that really works for me. It may take seventy years, but what’s life if not a series of trial, error, and successes?
Are you a busy person? A sloth-type like me? How do you make it all work? Share your secrets in the comments!